In case this was unclear: the suggestion was tongue-in-cheek. No one should make a PR. (But if they do, the cow should be rolling her eyes and flaming).
I believe that TTFP (and compilation time in general) is a priority and should improve soon. Also, packages should not litter the output with various messages.
Maybe I am overly optimistic, but in the meantime I consider it within the capacity of an average adult to wait a short while when loading unfamiliar package in a new programming language without assuming that the computer is broken.